


We're the ones left

by hanareader



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Byakugan, F/F, Hokage, Konoha Village, Language, Revenge, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-07 23:10:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11633892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanareader/pseuds/hanareader
Summary: At the Valley of the End, Sasuke killed Naruto. Sakura will take a page out of his book, she will have her revenge.Little does she know it, but Hinata feels the same.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [promises](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8877898) by [BombsAreForBabies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BombsAreForBabies/pseuds/BombsAreForBabies). 



> I think I've been waiting to write this for a while now.

She was worried. Naruto had told her he’d capture Sasuke and bring him home, that it would be easy, and soon before she knew it they would be a team once again. She believed him when he said it, with her whole heart she nodded her permission and watched as he left. It was sunset now with no further sign, no other person outside the village than herself: Sakura waited at the edge of the gates for what felt like years, hands clutched to the thing beating in her chest, blood turning cold.

(She already regretted sending him off, it's been way too long. Sakura prayed she didn’t have to regret it more.)

There was a barking of dogs. Sakura heard it, ignored it, until the sound got closer, her ears rung in the cacophony and her nose twitched at the slight smell of dog sweat. She blinked as she realized.

_Kakashi!_

A blur of white, one of the dogs, ignored her and went straight for the gates behind her back. She followed the small thing, confounded to find her sensei here.

Tall and dressed in ninja gear, he was too far away to observe his eyes.

“You need to come with,” Pakkun spoke. His voice was tired and his dog frame was avoiding hers, he was avoiding _her_.

Now Sakura wasn’t one for paranoia and the more she watched them the more she believed she hadn’t imagined it, they were actively avoiding her. Heads bowed and voices muted, Kakashi used hand signs to communicate to his ninken, rather than allowing her to overhear. She stepped closer to eavesdrop on their conversation but somehow she couldn’t, they weren’t letting her. They deeply wanted to discuss in private, something must be wrong.

Before the fire inside could incite her... darkening her eyes and tightening her small fists, Sakura wanted to make herself known. Loudly. Kakashi simply raised his gaze. He looked hard at her and she didn’t know what she should be looking for back, only limp silver hair and his complete mask, lacking of any smile. Both the single dark pupil and his Sharingan were empty of light, and tired, but his silence was the one thing that scared her most.

She outburst loud to make up for the smothering quiet.

“Kakashi-sensei!”

Sakura believed he was faking his smile. The kunoichi wasn’t Naruto nor blind, she wasn’t falling for it. “Ah. Sakura.”

“What’s the news?” rather than hearing the words he had to say she tried to find clues in his stance. He was relaxed at the shoulders but remained so silent, silent more than usual, they’d at least be some form of life in him somehow. He was their cool teacher but ignoring her wasn’t part of his style, motioning to his dogs and turning his face away wasn’t what she wanted to see.

Pakkun left in a screen of smoke and Sakura felt the cold instantly creep through her veins. Weren’t they supposed to be finding Sasuke? Why did he go?

What were they still doing here?

“Sakura. What I’m about to tell you is going to be very upsetting to hear. I know that-”

He was treating her... like a civilian. Like a non-combatant who didn’t understand war, this was a textbook response to grief victims. The way his voice slowed in false comfort, clear calm wording like babying a child made her face burn.

_How dare he-_

“Tell me already! I’m a part of Team 7 too, I deserve to know, sensei. Don’t screen the words, don’t say it, don’t _say it_ -”

she began to cry.

Sakura hated being like this. Angry. Sobbing. She didn’t even learn the reason yet. But unfortunately... _gods_ , unfortunately, she could guess. The tears ran down her cheeks and she couldn’t stop the flow or the way her voice wobbled, Sakura wanted to be the adult kunoichi but already she was failing, letting her emotions take control and make a fool of herself. Kakashi-sensei must be so so _tired_ , exhausted from receiving the worst of backload missions since the infiltration of the Chuunin Exams, only to find two of his students gone and her bawling her eyes out. He was proven right not to tell it straight to her face.

As she sobbed he was struck silent, standing awkwardly a few distances away without the chance to comfort her. Watching her at her worst. Sakura could only think and cry that it was her who made him so, she was too late to prove herself a real ninja, that she could handle this, that she-

Didn’t want to wait anymore. It was time she got out of this torturous limbo, waiting with her hands clasped was driving her crazy, crying and doing nothing was worse than knowing the real truth.

She… she wanted to be where Naruto is.

“Don’t tell me,” Sakura breathed shakily and the lump in her throat constricted. Determination settled somewhere in her heart, hard in her green eyes. “Show me.”

Sakura used both of her hands to scrub roughly at her pink face.

Kakashi simply walked past her. He didn’t signal or anything, he didn’t veer. Her stomach sunk with the nerves and she blinked away the last of her tears before running after him.

…

She thought it must’ve been chidori. Oh God.

The rains began to fall until her clothes soaked through and the yellow strands of hair clumped and curled against hard ground. The blood dribbled away through the cracks of rock, dark red and streaming with the natural runoff into the valley below. She watched the path it took, thin meandering branches that traveled slowly at first, gaining speed when the clouds poured harder, dribbling until all of it disappeared. The blood disappeared from sight before finally - finally - it stopped flowing. She watched the eerie stillness. There was just no more.

“It would’ve been quick.”

“A hole through his chest?” Sakura cupped a hand to her mouth and her stomach churned. Her voice was high, cracking at the seams. “A _hole_ through his chest?”

Her sensei stood silent.

“Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke, he-”

“Sasuke did this, yes.”

She muffled the strangled noise before it could escape, two hands clasped until she couldn’t breathe and the rain water frozen over her skin. She tightened the grip and the air was tight and short and coming up sharply when her hands were shaking. Her sight blurred making the brown stone turn gray, Naruto in his orange tracksuit, all disappearing from view.

“I’m assured a search party will be arranged in the morning. Myself including.”

“Sasuke will be labeled missing nin, with the immediate designation of kill-on-sight. His defection will be moved to a matter of high importance, effective immediately. Any of his whereabouts and associates included.” Kakashi talked, over the sound of the waterfall and the way Naruto’s clothing soaked through, translucent and sticking to his body.

She looked up at him.

“Leaf ninja or not, he has a high chance of being executed.”

When the clouds clashed it was a signal for stronger pours, Kakashi let her be and straightened. There was a meet of two hands and the air warmed slightly, chakra pinged when he released his jutsu. Sakura watched him with dulled green eyes. She didn’t know how he could even be moving, how he could be so professional, she wanted to learn how he wasn’t breaking.

“Sakura. I’m sorry.”

Pakkun reappeared and Kakashi walked off with the ninken, leaving her alone with... Naruto.

All she wanted was a team. All she wanted was for them to stop fighting and to finally be friends like she knew they wanted to, for the whole team together, happy. She remembered the times Naruto would do something silly and Sasuke would turn up his chin, and she would smile warmly because it was so obvious it was pretend snobbish behavior, purely in good humor. That was her team then, their dynamic, that was how they worked. They may fight at times but it was never anything personal, scathing or intended to hurt. It was to make each other grow. Sasuke baited Naruto and Naruto chased at his heels because they were boys, they were friends looking out for each other’s weaknesses. They were supposed to be a family.

There was a hole through his chest and now Sakura realized. Naruto was dead.

They could never _ever_ be a team again.

“Sakura. You need to get out of the rain. You’ll be sick.”

“Sasuke-kun? Sasuke-kun?” _did this?_

“Sakura.”

Did this happen before? Was this accounted for in the rulebooks? She never got to read something like this, one teammate turned traitor to apprentice for a man who performed experiments on live humans… the other teammate dead where she knelt, a punch through the chest before he could even turn thirteen.

This wasn't right.

Sakura told him to do it. She begged him to go. She wanted to have Sasuke back with her in the village where it’s safe, where somebody could treat him for his curse mark and where she was. Sakura thought that that would make him happy, while Naruto wanted to make _her_ happy. Naruto died and he failed in his promise when she was the one who asked him to go in the first place.

The faint charge of electricity in the air… she couldn’t believe how things could turn for the worst so fast.

Kakashi called for her name in the background, a ringing tinny in her ears, weak to the sound of her blood rushing. His voice was quiet in comparison to the slack in Naruto’s whiskered cheeks, dark blond lashes and closed eyes, and the damn, stupid, _peaceful_ smile he died having on his face, he _died_ -

“I’m going to kill him.”

“Sakura.”

Her fists clenched and she spoke words she never spoke truer before. “I’m going to kill him! I’m going to, just watch me, I can’t-”

She hid her face over his body. The water mixed quietly, soaking the clothing that was already drenched and cold, streams coming from her face wasn’t going to make much of a difference. She was quieter this time around, little hitches bleating from her throat, she was tired and the feet in her sandals hurt and all she wanted to do was go home and bathe and sleep. Small things, normal things. But she couldn’t do that anymore, could she, it wouldn’t be so easy. Nothing could ever be the same again.

Kakashi lifted her off of Naruto, peeling her away from the only teammate she had left. He spoke words that couldn’t register in her brain, thick, far away sounds and hands on her shoulders, and later the weight of a vest against the rain. Pink strands stuck to her face but her eyes remained on Naruto, even when the sealing process was complete and his body transferred into a tiny scroll of paper. Kakashi pocketed the thing, slipping what was Naruto’s body so easily. He returned back to Pakkun but her sight was getting fuzzy, he motioned to the ninken before it shunshinned.

‘ _Kyuubi...’_ , she thought she heard.

Kakashi had his hands in his pockets the whole time, quiet as he led her back home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are unlucky. My dumbass spilled tea across my keyboard so I had to shut it down and resist turning it on for a few days. I even wrote this chapter on oldschool paper… but that meant I was delayed a week. So if my computer dies in the near future, you know why.

“You can’t go after him, Sakura. You are to stay here until I say otherwise.”

Of course this was the first thing she hears.

“What? What do you mean I can’t go after him, Kakashi promised me.”

Tsunade’s attention was elsewhere as if she couldn’t acknowledge her to her face, look her in the eyes. She signed a few extra documents without a second blink, mindlessly moving on to the next one.

The conversation was already made one-sided and Sakura had to bite herself to keep control.

“It’s a very delicate situation that we’ve found ourselves in, where our timing becomes crucial. It concerns information not particular to you. Shizune can brief you the specifics but my decision stays final.”

“He killed Naruto!”

Tsunade raised her brown eyes.

“Yes, we’ve already processed the documentation. Sasuke will now be labeled missing nin status across Fire Country.”

“Then you’re letting him get away!”

“I’m sure I was told you were more mature than this, I haven’t done anything.”

“Exactly, you _haven’t_.”

Tsunade shot from her chair and the desk groaned under the weight of her fists. Two hands that sunk into the wood gradually as the woman held herself back, breathing through her nose carefully. “He and his _team_ ,” she spat and Sakura flinched. “Hurt a lot of our youngest ninjas, the future of Konoha herself. Not just Naruto.”

Her smaller frame fell into itself, curling at the shoulders under the Hokage’s hard stare. Her eyes turned away before it could see too much.

“You want me to send out more?”

Her voice was bitter. “No, Hokage-sama.”

“What if that was you too?” The woman spoke into the open and Sakura lifted her eyes curiously, blinked.

Tsunade avoided speaking further. “Anyway, we can’t afford to divide our forces after him for the second time. Believe me when I say this: now is not the occasion.”

“He’s going to escape,” Sakura simply stated. “He’s going to win.”

Tsunade glared her down but she stubbornly glared back. Her chin jutted and green eyes glowed bright with fury, she wasn’t going to let herself be refused like this when she _knew_ that the Lady Hokage cared for Naruto too. It didn’t make any sense. So what if she was disobeying direct orders, this was stupid and Tsunade couldn’t cut it otherwise.

Sasuke did something wrong. That made him a criminal. Weren’t they supposed to do the right thing, weren’t they supposed to protect their own?

Sakura faced her off with silence and she watched as the Hokage grew steadily annoyed, motioning the positioned anbu guards out the room. They bowed in the corner of her eye and Tsunade waved them off before slumping in her seat. Sakura twisted her lip in irritation and the Hokage watched her with cool brown eyes, a cheek rested on a loosely held fist.

She sighed deeply. “What would you have me do, Sakura, tell me.”

“We should go after him before it’s too late. After enough time has wasted, Sasuke will-”

“Meet with Orochimaru soon, yes. Let’s say before that you catch up with him, could you take him?”

Sakura swallowed. “Well.”

“Could you?”

“I-”

Tsunade’s voice was knowing. She shrugged. “He killed Naruto, as you keep saying.”

It hurt to say it, and her mouth mumbled. “…No.”

“No is right.”

Sakura really hated those words. Why was she so nonchalant about this?

“So? Does that mean we should still let him go? Kakashi-sensei was supposed to be _here_.”

Tsunade spoke quietly. “It’s something a lot more than that.” She averted her face and her exhaustion was made visible, deep, etched lines along her cheeks and the corners of her eyes. She was tired and Sakura knew she was only making it worse, the more she fought for this the harder it was. But it wasn’t about how tired the Hokage was, it was about _him_.

This was worth it.

“Sasuke is one of the last two Uchiha left, carrying a highly advanced Sharingan. I don’t know how else to tell you this but Naruto… Naruto was someone important to him. He was his only friend and Sasuke knew it. Sasuke used it to his advantage.” Tsunade sighed heavily until her shoulders slumped and all Sakura could focus on was the words forming on her mouth, the way her chest rose and fell.

“He killed Naruto for a reason. We have evidence that experiencing extreme trauma, such as killing someone close to you evolves those who carry the Sharingan. Their eyes register the trauma and manifest into what is called stage two Sharingan, the Mangekyou. Kakashi and I believe that Sasuke knew this, and killed Naruto for this very purpose.”

Her words trailed.

“This upgrade ensures that he’d be on equal terms power-wise with his brother. Even if it’s been half a day since encountering him, no one is quite sure just how powerful he is… This situation is a bit unprecedented.”

She disagreed.

“Sakura.”

Sakura knew Naruto was someone close to her, she could tell in the way the medic sannin treated him over the rest, scolding him and pulling his ear, showing him affection far past courtesy. Despite her varied skillsets, Lady Tsunade wasn’t a mothering figure but she could be one even if only for a smile – when Naruto was around. He was gone and the cold exterior was the only thing left, strict Hokage ordering her down. The woman was avoiding her. Hedging. Where was her infamous temper? Sakura clenched her hands behind her back and didn’t say a word, she stood stiffly, green eyes glaring at a chip far right of the Hokage desk, lips spread thin.

“Sakura.” The woman repeated.

She wasn’t loud like Naruto. She was logical. Sakura was a good student, a good follower, and nothing like the individual Naruto was… like the rebel Sasuke was. If it was her death, Naruto wouldn’t take this quietly and Sasuke couldn’t be tamed. But no matter how she tried she couldn’t speak out like her teammates would: she couldn’t bow her head and accept this, she couldn’t move from her spot. She was stuck in limbo. Tsunade looked at her knowingly, with soft, warm brown eyes and it pissed her the hell off.

Sakura didn’t know what to do.

“I know you must be upset.”

She grit her teeth and glared.

“Naruto was someone very important to me.”

“Then it doesn’t make sense!” She outburst, realized, then quieted. “Hokage-sama,” she spat belatedly.

“Maybe it doesn’t…” The older woman watched her closely and she felt like she was under the glass of a microscope, enclosed and under speculation. Sakura stood her ground while the nerves roiled from her belly to her legs. She didn’t know how to proceed from here, this woman was known for her monstrous punches that could take out mountains against anyone that’d cross her wrong.

This same woman was eerily still when she looked through her and all Sakura could do was frown, wonder what was stopping her, where was her grief? She expected more.

“Shizune will escort you out.”

Sakura exhaled sharply.

“Maybe after you talk with her you’ll understand where I’m coming from.” The cold voice was back.

That was it then, was it? Was it? And now her Inner was quiet.

“Sakura.” She was already half way to the door, legs heavy and body tense with anger, though she couldn’t tell exactly who she was angry at. Any more of this conversation was going to make her snap.

“I hope your view of him doesn’t change.”

“I thought you were on his side.”

She slammed the door on her way out.

…

Dammit... Dammit…

When the hot tears finally stopped flowing, she wiped her face and knocked her head back against the building walls, thundering at her headache. The hall was empty and Shizune’s office was only a couple of doors away but Sakura didn’t want to move. She shouldn’t have left. She should’ve fought harder. No excuse was worth it.

Sakura thought she was on his side too.

The hands at her sides hugged tightly and shook, she inhaled for air delicately. Her eyes faced the ceiling, watching the gray dotted thing as if she could avoid her thoughts. But Sakura was guilty as charged regardless of how she saw it, the moment she left the room. She accepted, hesitated, like always. Something that couldn’t be taken back.

After too much time had passed, Sakura trudged away from the Hokage doors even as it tore her apart inside.

…

Shizune’s hair was in a ponytail today. Short and tufty at the tips, the single black strands plucked out of the sides and caught her attention. The office paperwork on her desk sorted into tall, individual piles, while a half empty tissue box sat in the middle, barely hidden underneath the paperwork. Sakura guessed the thing, she could see used tissues strewn across her immediate floor. Shizune looked up at her in the eyes, and the emotion Sakura felt halved, the guilt soured, increasing by the second as she watched thin streaks of smudged makeup.

“Naruto’s body is still alive.” Shizune spoke quietly.

“What?” Sakura’s attention caught. For the second time today, her heart skipped beat. She raced closer in a flurry. “Why, why didn’t you tell me, he’s alive, _where_ -?”

Shizune shook her head sadly and Tonton at her feet whined until she picked the pig up, petting her to calm herself. “No, Naruto himself is gone. But we have reason to believe his body is active and rapidly leaving the country as we speak.”

Sakura’s eyes widened.

“Tsunade must have wanted to avoid telling you herself… dammit.” Shizune massaged at the temples of her head, stretching the dark circles underneath her eyes. Tonton whimpered. The woman continued muttering to herself already off into another world until time was wasting, and nobody was telling her anything, and Sakura could feel the fire rushing through her blood again the more the more she ignored her.

The more she ignored Naruto.

Why was no one telling her anything?

“Well?! What the hell do you mean his body is alive, I watched Kakashi seal him, I saw him, I _touched_ him. Are you saying someone stole his body?”

Shizune’s voice was low and heavy, her gaze downcast in thought. “No, no one stole his body.”

“Then what the hell is going on? Why can’t we go after Sasuke?” she demanded.

Shizune looked at her. Her stare was tired and even Tonton crawled away, smaller, her pink form grieved. The air was silent and stuffy, after the rains humidity spread across the town, thickening the smell of dust in her nose and making her throat scratchy. She didn’t want to admit there was a lump already there and forming.

“What I’m about to tell you will take a while and is highly classified information, Sakura. Probably more so now than ever.” She looked away and Sakura could almost have missed it but she was never wrong.

Guilt. Shizune looked like her; Tsunade must have felt the same.

The last time she demanded to know she ultimately regretted it. The moment she heard was the moment she joined them, and absorbed their excuses. Sakura swallowed thickly and she hesitated but in the end there was no other choice for her to choose. She was silent and Shizune took that as her acceptance.

“Somebody stealing his form is close, though it goes back further than that. Sit down before I begin, about the attack against the Leaf Village that happened over 12 years ago… and the ninetails demon fox, the Kyuubi.”

…

_‘-all of the major villages will be scrambling to recapture this demon. We don’t know how it escaped, but we know for a fact that if Naruto dies Kyuubi is sure to die with him. It was expected that Naruto would be healed and kept alive by the demon’s chakra – if solely for this special consideration.’_

_‘Although Sasuke carries the Sharingan we think it’s highly unlikely he could master it to the level of controlling another tailed beast. Though others believe otherwise, and he is evidenced as the only one present in the area… there have been no past history of training with seals from him, at least none that we know of.’_

_‘Many don’t want to admit that the yondaime’s seal may have lost its integrity, though that is one other possibility.’_

_‘We believe, however, that someone was watching… someone else was there. They released the seal, maybe in the hopes of ensuring the demon lives, even as Naruto dies. The Kyuubi seeing the opportunity could have overcome his helper and escaped. Although the image of a demon is very striking, taller than this Hokage building and stronger than the gods… foxes are known to be sly and experts at trickery. Kyuubi must have forgone revenge in favor of his freedom, we believe he assumes Naruto’s form rather than the great chakra being he is normally, to help in his escape.’_

_‘We need to get the demon back. Tsunade didn’t want to tell you this because Naruto... Naruto was more than what’s inside him. She wanted you to know that. She wanted to show you that. But her hands are tied. All the villages will soon be after this opportunity to claim the tailed beast for their own, not including the Akatsuki. Before anyone else can steal the advantage, we have to focus our efforts on recapture. Not on Naruto. Not on grieving. We can’t go after Sasuke.’_

_‘I’m very sorry, Sakura.’_

_…_

Sakura knew her sensei was lying when he said capturing Sasuke was their first priority but she didn’t know why he even bothered. All she could hear was Kyuubi, Kyuubi, and now that she knew who Kyuubi was it didn’t make her feel any better listening to them. Some people were set to whispering, and the only thing of topic was the fox, while Naruto meant nothing.

He could’ve told her instead of lying to her. He could’ve been here to tell her himself. She could’ve watched his face. Maybe then it wouldn’t hurt so much.

Kakashi was gone in the morning before she could ask him these questions, and he left without so much as a note or a goodbye. As strongest in the village, he was after the Kyuubi too. Sakura wanted to get to training immediately but she’s been placed in the care of Team 10’s sensei Kurenai, blatant babysitting if she ever saw it. The genjutsu expert was left behind in the frantic search for the demon while every other experienced ninja was immediately ordered away. Inner Sakura seethed, outer let her eyes wander away from the back of curly dark hair to Team 10’s training, to the mass of clouds dominating the sky, the wind sharp and biting at her cheeks.

She was annoyed and her brain was pounding, over the things Shizune said.

_‘Naruto was more than what’s inside him.’_

_Well then, why the fuck were they after Kyuubi then?_

“-you may join us if you’d like.”

Kurenai’s voice was musical and sweet. It cleanly cut through her thoughts, soft around the edges and seconds away from giving her physical contact, a hug or maybe something hot to drink. Sakura twisted her lips sharply and frowned, she didn’t need any coddling.

“No. No thank you,” Sakura replied, she shifted her green eyes from that red stare, too much like Sasuke’s and knowing.

“If you change your mind.” Kurenai said. The kunoichi walked off.

The only ones aware of his passing were the experienced ninja, Shizune had requested of her silence. For now, and she guessed for as long as Kyuubi needed to be recaptured, every one of their original rookie class was to remain ignorant. It hurt to keep herself silent, to stop herself from grieving… her feet brushing against lush green grass and the warm sunlight, it seemed as if everything was mocking her to her face. She was ordered to remain exactly where she was, where Akamaru chirped happily and she could hear Hinata’s soft giggles, everyone else was peaceful _unknowing_.

Her small fists clenched.

She wished she could be that. Kiba and Akamaru were able to heal quickly, she could tell by their excited yipping and the energy they delivered in their practice match. Shino, aware of the healing still required, made his bugs move gentle and considerate when Kiba stumbled.

They were already a better team than what she received, so much so it almost hurt to watch.

So she looked away.

Their third teammate patiently stood by near the trees. Hinata quickly noticed her, and that was the real cold kicker wasn’t it, the girl shook in her hands and bowed sharply when she came forward.

“Good morning, S-sakura-san.”

She thought to God, if there was one listening anyway… that this was just cruel, Hinata fidgeted with her oversized coat, toying with the coattails and twitching her fingers. She was soft purple and cloying sweetness that it hurt to watch her blush lightly and hide her eyes away.

It was so obvious. This was the girl that liked Naruto.

“How are you?”

“I’m fine,” Sakura said stiffly before planting herself in the grass, knees bent and muscles tight. Hinata floundered for a moment before she settled down softly next to her, adjusting her clothes to look neat, though Sakura could see it was mostly nerves and to have something to do with her hands.

“Um. Neji returned yesterday but he’s been in bed all day.”

“That’s good.”

“I mean, he’ll recover soon! Just, he needs some time. He was glad to help,” Her voice rose worried she’d misunderstood something but Sakura didn’t care. Hinata was earnest and she blended against the background, though admittedly that wasn’t a very nice reason to be near her. She smelled like sweet cream and vanilla, until it was easy to ignore her Inner, and the sun, and the practice match below, even if only for a moment.

Sakura didn’t expect the quiet. Maybe it was just a side effect of Naruto not being there, but the weather was plain when she expected a storm, after two of her teammates had left. After she promised her revenge, she expected more, the strong arm of justice to be swift and finished. She didn’t expect to wait, all over again.

Didn’t she say she was tired of waiting?

“I wanted to help too! I would’ve helped get Sasuke-san for you.”

“No, thanks,” she said sharply, though inside she knew she was being a bit much.

There was no reason to be rude. The day Hinata had to try to foster conversation was a sad day indeed.

“Oh. I mean-! You could’ve done it too, of course. He’s your teammate… of course.”

Sakura looked at her.

“Um.”

“You’re really shy aren’t you?”

Those eyes were downcast. “Yes. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to say anything then.” Sakura said, though the words were a bit cold. She was feeling the irritation rise under her skin until her mouth spoke, things that she didn’t mean. It was a bad feeling when Hinata made herself a convenient target, hands clasped in her lap and dark hair spilling over her eyes.

“Oh, um. Okay.”

Well that made her feel worse.

Sakura thought that the girl was a bit weird back in the academy, and Ino did too. She was the only one who didn’t have a crush on Sasuke, the only one who didn’t wear fashionable clothes or makeup, the only one who didn’t _talk_. Hinata, shy as she was, couldn’t relate to those her age, and as a result didn’t surround herself with many female friends.

Which was a lot like what she used to be. The thought was something hard to swallow when she looked at her, it was the same crush, the put-upon sweetness, the same shy glances, Sasuke- _kun_ -

And right now it was making her sick.

“Sakura-san?”

Sakura didn’t mean to put a damper on her hopes now, sitting next to her. Her hands were lily white and soft, while Sakura’s clenched her fists too tightly. She “casually” tore clumps of dirt and grass in her frustration, generating a sharp ripping sound but Hinata was too polite to say anything.

She was too nice, too innocent. She didn’t deserve this.

“I _meant_ ,” Sakura let out a deep breath. “You don’t have to make conversation just because I’m sitting here. If it’s hard for you,” she added. “I get it and I didn’t misunderstand, I won’t think you’re being rude.”

Her face went bright bright red.

“I’m sorry, Hinata. I’m not in a particularly good mood today which had nothing to do with you.”

She nodded quickly and quietly.

The space was awkward after that.

Rather than piling her apology, Sakura closed her mouth. She sat. Hinata kneeled next to her. The boys kept practicing further off while Kurenai-sensei watched. The girl kept herself Hyuga heir composed and Sakura… some feeling swept up in her until she wanted to break that, the more the silence stretched the more the dangerous name soured in the back of her throat, and she wanted to scream and make it _known_ , wanted this girl to feel how she felt because-

She was just sitting there. Hinata was too much like herself that Sakura thought Inner could overcome, quiet, watching at the sidelines, waiting.

Not searching, avenging, winning.

But that wasn’t a fair assessment anyway, to begin with. That didn’t match up. It’s not like she knew Naruto was dead and even if she did, even if she faced off Tsunade herself…

“Hinata?” Her voice came out rough and scratchy around the edges, fragile. It was heavy with emotion and blurry off her tongue until Sakura had to purse her lips, focus on anything else.

She wanted to say it. _I’m sorry, Hinata, he was gone. I'm sorry, Hinata, I told him to go. I’m sorry, Hinata, we can’t get Sasuke back because he was the one who killed Naruto, punched a hole through his chest. I’m sorry, Hinata, because now it's forever, he’ll never know how you feel._

But she wasn’t, was she? She wasn’t.

“Hm?” Large, pale eyes turned to her and blinked of dark lashes. Her hair was cut short with only two large pieces to frame her face, round her nose and soften her cheeks. She was cute. Sakura could see Naruto liking her, loving her. Marrying her, even.

Sakura swallowed.

“You really cared for Naruto, didn’t you?”

Her skin flared bright pink. “Y-yes!”

Hinata wasn’t loud like he was, maybe she too couldn’t go immediately after Sasuke but-

That didn’t mean she’d _ever_ stop loving Naruto.

“Thank you,” Sakura said, and allowed a small smile at the quiet power from her voice. It hurt, because she knew, but nonetheless Sakura meant the words coming out of her mouth. “Thank you. I think he’d like that.” Hinata blushed brighter and nodded with enthusiasm before staring down at her lap.

Sakura thought, only idly in that moment, that maybe she won’t give up just yet.


	3. Chapter 3

She didn’t _want_ to give up just yet. She didn’t know why, maybe it was her stubborn Inner and the infuriating itch in her bones, staring at the walls of her pink room trying to sleep. Her desk. Her mirror. She stared at these things until her eyes glazed dully and her breathing slowed, and right before sleep took her, her thoughts came to a sudden clarity.

It must’ve been… the stories she read. The romances. The knight in shining armor that’d sweep up the princess in his arms, those stories that she shouldn’t have borrowed from the library because it was all cheap emotions and nothing in it intellectually stimulating, she knew that yet she took them home. She read them. Sakura eagerly twirled the pages and giggled and dreamed it was Sasuke in the books with her as the princess; Sasuke with his dead monotone and dark, gloomy expression, which made her laugh even more, pause suddenly, stop laughing, shake and scold herself for even reading those childish things in the first place.

Sakura believed in those stories because she believed in heroes. She believed in Naruto. And for some reason she thought that after he died… the world would align and balance itself once again, because it was just nature, it was the right thing to do. Somebody would come in to save the day, the happy ending.

It’s been a week, Kyuubi was long gone and yet this wrong had not been made _right_.

…

It was a small gathering and an even smaller reception, where she could recognize every face, there was no one here that Naruto knew which she didn’t. No parents. Sakura didn’t know what to think about that.

The entire rookie class was here, except for Chouji.

“He was one of a kind. The deadlast of our class and resident prankster, he was the only ninja I knew who’d follow his heart before anything else, or dismiss the rules if it was getting in his way.” Sakura began, her voice growing steadier as she strung together the words. It was a little tactless the route she was taking but she believed it was something Naruto would do, that Naruto would want her to say. Dismissing the rules, not to mention basic social courtesy, Sakura kept talking if only to steal her chance at revenge.

She told herself she’d pray later.

“Not a lot of people knew him, I sure didn’t, I thought he was a just short kid with taste for ramen, miso flavor being his favorite.” People stood around the grass and her head was somber over the small memorial. “He wasn’t what I thought. He had many secrets behind a happy face and he hid them well, until the only thing I can remember about him was his smile, the color orange, not to mention the last time he asked me out on a date.”

They chuckled and laughed, but she couldn’t spare a smile.

She knew what she was going to say next, and it wasn’t going to be pretty.

“Uchiha Sasuke had a dream of getting revenge. Uzumaki Naruto wanted to become Hokage. I never really had a dream to begin with, I was okay with supporting either of their dreams from the sidelines, because I wanted to be the glue that held the team together. But I failed. Now I think we all know that Sasuke was never-” don’t. “never redeemable in the first place.”

When Sakura lifted her gaze, she tried to make eye contact with everyone in her vicinity, she tried to do what Naruto would have done. Shout, say something momentarily inappropriate that’d get everyone’s attention, before being right in that impossible way he always was. Say the thing that everyone must be thinking.

Her heart raced under her skin like the beat of a hummingbird, fast and panicking and louder than she’d ever been before in her life.

“Sasuke must be stopped!” After she said the words, her heart returned to hammering in her chest, and she inhaled, exhaled, until her pink hair downed like heavy bristles and calmed. Sweat trickled lower on her skin, before she hurriedly wiped her brow.

She looked around even though she told herself she wasn’t going to just yet, before she lost her nerve. Sakura found him, tall grey thing hiding in the background, white-shock hair sticking high, mask hiding everything.

She couldn’t tell what Kakashi-sensei was thinking.

The doubt churned within her but her mouth kept forming the words. “Sasuke has to be stopped. The happy boy that we all knew, he was going to be Hokage. But he died before he could reach his dreams. His dreams are gone,” she said half to herself.

When Sakura looked at Tsunade the air punched out of her stomach. The woman was looking at her too, but she couldn’t recognize her brown eyes, dull, far away things, seeing right through her skin. Shizune held Tonton, gaze downcast, embarrassed for her.

Sakura burned bright, bright red.

“We must work together to get Sasuke!” Her fists clenched with a leftover fury. She ignored Shizune, ignored Tsunade, she didn’t care if they were disappointed with her because it was already too late. Her green eyes passed over them and she had to keep speaking.

“We _must_ ,” she emphasized.

After that, it was a long wait. Her breath slowed as the adrenaline slowly left her, dissipated from her muscles. Akamaru whined into the quiet, only a small, almost insignificant sound that broke through the wind and made her jump, suddenly remember exactly where she was standing. When she turned to the sound Kiba couldn’t look her in the eyes. Sakura’s stare bored as her face muscles twisted, painfully, regretfully, as the damning red flamed up to her ears.

Why was it so quiet? _Where_ was he looking? Her hands were shaking.

She clasped them together before herself and her eyes had fallen. Her voice broke a little, razor sharp at the edges and glass out of her mouth. Sakura swallowed thickly. “B-because Naruto may be gone, but he still lives on in our hearts and our minds.”

Neji’s eye bandages slipped low and he adjusted them.

“Losing Naruto is one thing, but the mission itself is ongoing, so there’s still hope.”

Shikamaru clenched his forehead protector in his hand out of respect, the blue ribbons long and still.

“I think it’s important to continue his legacy and the legacy of Konoha to never let wrong get away,” she said.

When Sakura looked forward, Hinata’s face was closed to her, hidden behind the ceremonial bouquet held in her hands.

Sunflowers. Bright and yellow and taller than the girl behind the stalks, peeking a hint of blue hair inbetween.

Maybe it was the color that woke her up, or the two hands hugging the thing to her chest… tiny hiccups with twin shaking shoulders that were too easy to mistake. The flowers stood tall and stiff to move any. She looked small. Innocent.

Young.

Hinata was the only sound in the entire place of a funeral and her voice kept going and going, little noises that stung Sakura with every breath because she couldn’t stop. Everyone else was quiet. It was a graveyard full of people; no, Sakura corrected herself… full of _ninja_. It was heavy and dampening her senses as she watched the group of beaten kids before her, all with varying bruises and old wounds to heal. She couldn’t ask them for more. The only thing she could hear was her own heartbeat and Hinata’s soft sounds, and nothing else, nothing because Naruto was gone and that didn’t mean they lost their best man. They didn’t just utterly fail the mission.

They lost something bigger.

Light, delicate sobbing was the singular soundtrack to the thought pealing in her mind, a shot of embarrassment at her naivety and _god, please, **please** , I don’t wanna die next too._

…

She should be ashamed of herself.

Sakura promptly stepped down, and the procession was quickly over, wrapped up, put away and done with without another fuss. She was quiet. Sakura stayed muted and despondent even as she was ushered into the Hokage’s office, her black clothes hot and sweaty against her skin.

The desk slammed.

“Now you’re trying to take my soldiers out from under me? Huh?! What the hell was that?”

“I’m sorry, Hokage-sama.”

“No, you do _not_ get to apologize to me, Sakura, what were you trying to do, do you think you are the Hokage? Can you do my job better than I can, little girl?”

“No.”

Tsunade cornered her. “No. And yet I have to see you work against me directly to my _face_ – Sakura, what were you thinking?”

“I don’t know,” she said thickly, and the words scratched harsh against the lump in her throat. “I don’t know.”

Tsunade sighed as she looked down on her, green vest removed in place of something black. It made her domineering. It made Sakura shy her face away.

Her voice went curious. “Your teachers tell me that you’re not usually like this. Iruka-sensei tells me you rarely talk back. You’re smart. You’re very intelligent. You must have an answer for yourself.”

Sakura mutely shook her head.

Tsunade’s eyes softened, she could see them when the woman rested her hand on her shoulder, prompting her to look up at her face. The Hokage was patient, but expectant, holding her stare with cool, brown judgement.

Sakura didn’t know what else to say nor did she know what else to do. Naruto always held a thumbs up in hard times like these, with his big stupid smile, large white teeth grinning. His eyes would scrunch into crescents and his lashes were clear, sparkling in blond. He was bright. He… he made her feel like heroes were real.

(But in the end he died a ninja, not a hero.)

Sakura didn’t fully process what that could mean yet. She thought maybe that was her own mind trying to protect itself.

Brown eyes went hard. “You need to tell me now, I can’t have my ninjas convening their own self-assigned missions, and I don’t want to expect this to come up again. Talk.”

Sakura swallowed.

Tsunade quickly narrowed her eyes. “Given your recent circumstances… you qualify for psychiatric care with a specialized therapist trained with ninja. You can go there if you like. You can talk.” Tsunade’s grip tightened until her manicured nails dug into her shoulder and Sakura gasped at the sting. The woman did it on purpose. She looked up with conflicted eyes. “Or, you don’t have to talk at all, you can go home permanently. You can quit. I have your information here in order to reinstate you into a trade school, what is it you like, reading? I can get you stationed at the library or as an assistant in one of my military offices.”

Sakura spoke in a small voice. “I don’t want to quit.”

“Is that so? You seem to want to go off and do your own thing as you please, don’t you?”

“No, Hokage-sama.”

“I have it listed here that you had a crush on your ex-teammate during your Academy stay. It’s okay, Sakura. It takes time to reprocess your feelings-”

“No!” she pushed.

“Sakura.”

Sakura furrowed her forehead until her brow slanted and her face was tight with the tension. Tsunade’s eyes went soft, the warmth of it pissed her off because her patience was damning, Sakura tried to keep count of her breathing.

“I don’t know, Hokage-sama, I really don’t know. I can’t do _nothing_ ,” she said.

The fingers at her shoulders twitched but she barely noticed.

“Hokage-sama, please. I’m not strong enough by myself. I need help. I don’t know what I’m doing but all I can think is I can’t do nothing, I can’t.”

Sakura didn’t want Naruto to see her like this.

“I’m not as strong as Sasuke or Naruto, I mean I thought… there was no way he could lose, he was such a good kid. A good person. People like him should live. I’m not like him, I’m-”

“Oi, I think I get it, you can stop it now,” the woman clasped her shoulder and Sakura clenched her fists at her sides, the tips of pink bangs and tatami mats consuming her vision.

She was scared.

“You don’t have to cry.”

“I know,” her voice wobbled.

“Naruto understands.”

Sakura slowly shook her head.

The rage against Sasuke was still there, buried deep and covered, simmering like a pot on the boil while she felt other things, her shame, Kakashi’s quiet, Naruto’s smile, her wrists thin as she turned her hands as if to find the strength inside. It wasn’t fair when everything became more and more complex, and she itched to do something, act quickly, but she was stuck in herself. It wasn’t so simple.

“Alright then.” Tsunade straightened her back until she stood tall and imposing, the infamous sannin she was revered to be. Sakura lifted her eyes weakly, a little cautious and distrusting when the Hokage gave her a smirk full of confidence. She was tired, and emotionally empty, tired of policing what to feel, not knowing what she should do.

Lady Tsunade, however, smoothly drove all her worries away.

“I’ve decided; Sakura. How would you like to become my student?”

…

His best friend did this.

Sasuke did this.

Hinata waited until everyone had left to finally place the flowers on the stone, the weight of the tall stalks leaving her hands empty and numb. She found them in a meadow a while back, these sunflowers behind the Hokage Mountain for acres, freely swaying themselves to the wind. She decided on the first few because they reminded her of him, bright and yellow and bigger than the whole world that they stood upon.

But where was he standing now? Sasuke had cut him down with his own hands.

“No,” she said, and the rusty voice of hers surprised her.

It wasn’t her eyes that made her think it, imagine the scene before her of twin energies clashing. It was the done deal of it all, quickly come and quickly gone, the quietness of the funeral and the lack of surprise in her teammates faces because they knew something about Sasuke that she didn’t. They expected something like this. Shino had left early and Kiba cursed sharply to himself, turned away from her with Akamaru at his heels.

Hinata frowned in thought. Her pale eyes were open. She found herself focused on the slight dip of Naruto’s grave, a hasty job of the stone plant and the way the dirt fell, quick and aerated before compacting by the earlier rain. She remembered that Naruto was their friend too, back in the academy days. She believed that he was somebody special. He could’ve never get hurt and he could have never ended up here like this, under a stone stabbed in the back by somebody he thought was closest to him. No. _No_. She thought he deserved better than that out of all people, he deserved more because it was just too terrible to think it, this was the _worst_ way for him to go.

Did he even fight back?

Hinata cried.

She was glad no one was here to see her like this. Not right now. She thought over it, and her hands were shaking realizing that no, he wouldn’t have fought back, not really, not seriously, because Sasuke was his friend and Naruto was too kind for that. He would have died… like a sitting duck, thinking of him in only the best. For a moment Hinata couldn’t breathe, she whimpered as her lungs ran short for air, clutching at the ends of her jacket, oversize in black and not in the least warm enough.

Neji with his gentle fist glowing sharp blue, pulsing and deadly but not as cold as his eyes, and she could feel what he must have felt, right when the jutsu touched her heart.

She knew exactly how he died.

“He was a good kid.” Hinata turned and the man smiled gently at her, air blowing in soft amusement. He was old. “He would’ve been happy to hear he had such good friends.”

“No, sir,” she said quietly. She should’ve realized that these flowers were too late, they’d only wither and rot on his name stone throughout the course of the week and yet he’d never know.

Naruto would never _know_.

“Oh? Why is that?”

“Because I-” She struggled to admit, “I wasn’t his friend.”

The man walked to her side, until he was tall and listening, his white hair swaying into her periphery.

“I never really talked to him. I tried to, I wanted to, but I got scared.”

The big man hummed.

“So you decided that you’re not his friend because of that?”

Hinata got frustrated. “ _Yes_ ,” she said thickly, and she didn’t want to be rude but she wanted to be alone now, she didn’t want to answer this stranger’s questions.

“Ah, sorry, sorry, maybe I should’ve held my tongue. I just couldn’t watch such a young student cry, not someone that was his age. You know him? He was such a hyper kid and I can’t begin to think-”

“He’s still here,” she spoke quietly.

With old, dark eyes he watched her seriously, the lines of his face stretched to his chin like red streams.

“I thought he was… a few days ago, I was so sure.”

The man eyed her carefully. “I’m sorry but he’s been gone for a week,” he said.

Hinata kept her hands to herself and her body in check, everything from her breathing to the shivering of her limbs, to the closed off cross of her arms, defensive and smaller and bothered talking to this man, who frowned at her forehead then turned curious over her eyes.

“Hyuuga… Hanabi; no, the older one, no? Hima-”

“Hinata.”

“Ah, right. Hinata.”

She shyed from the introductions. She didn’t want to talk to him anymore.

“You liked him a lot huh?”

“I’m sorry, mister-”

“Jiraiya.”

She swallowed. “Jiraiya-san. I would like to be-” she tried to finish but clipped her tongue, twisting sharply in her mouth. She kept her eyes low and her head even lower but it didn’t ease the difficulty of saying it out loud.

Alone. She wanted to be alone. Naruto was gone.

But the man persisted. “Hinata,” he said until she was forced to look up at him and he squatted to her height with his large scroll at his back.

“How far is your range of Byakugan?”

Her voice cracked. “W-what? What-t does that have to do with anything?”

“Trust me. You may not know who I am but I work for Konoha as the right hand for the Hokage. I need to know how far your range goes. Did you watch him a lot?”

She never asked for an interrogation. Hinata hugged her thoughts to herself. “Yes.”

“Have you noticed anything strange about his chakra, maybe? Once or twice?”

“Yes.”

“Was that what you noticed a few days ago, Hinata?”

“Yes.”

Jiraiya sighed. It was a sound half with exasperation and understanding, looking at her with wiser eyes. “I know you’re tired of talking to me.”

Hinata remained silent.

“I just want you to know that I believe you when you said you felt him a few days ago.”

She didn’t flinch.

“Well, I think that’s my cue,” he said with a wide stretch of his arms before rising into a stand. Hinata tucked her hands in her pockets and let her bangs fall over her face until Jiraiya-san fully left.

Afterward, she didn’t mean to do it. Hinata warned herself _no_. She activated her Byakugan when he was far far gone, closing her eyes as if she could delay the information from processing but she couldn’t. She found nothing of what he was saying, nothing at all, searching desperately only to see the dark chakra outline of the forest trees with no more ninja. Nothing under her feet.

She was finally alone like she wanted.

…

Neji was the first change. When she looked at him, he bowed for once where he never used to bow before. She was surprised even if she never let it show on her face, curious at his courtesy, frozen when he got to the tatami mats on his knees.

Hinata didn’t speak. He rose before walking past her, long hair light in his breeze, brushing cold against her skin. He did what every other Branch House member would do, and allowed her the privacy of the room. He left her alone.

…

She was called later into the Hokage’s office.

“Hinata. We’ve been discussing about you,” the Hokage said as she walked inside, her eyes falling onto the group before her. Her father in his white robes before the godaime’s desk, the man from earlier perched against the window. Her sister was here too, hands behind her back, straightened upward like her dad.

Tsunade started. “Jiraiya here is a toad sage of Mount Myoboku, one of the three infamous sannin and my teammate. He is also one of the few master sealers we have left. He will be first in the search and recapture of the Kyuubi. And for that he will need your help.”

Her father spoke first.

“You want to take an unsealed Branch out of Konoha? I don’t doubt your skill level, Jiraiya-sama, but excuse me when I say your mastery may be beyond both the search for Kyuubi _and_ my daughter’s protection.”

“She said she can identify the Kyuubi’s chakra-”

“She’s twelve.”

“She’s the closest chance we have in recapturing the nine tails. Should the Akatsuki catch wind of the beast we-”

“You’re going to be placing her in distance with the _Akatsuki_? I cannot have any member of my clan in close distance with that terrorist group. Not amongst the traitor Uchiha Itachi. Especially not so soon after this Sasuke’s desertation.” Her father spoke calmly and clearly, like he always done, dominating the room space. “You understand what that means, don’t you? You understand what people may say? The majority of the last free doujutsu of Konoha, outside her bounds? Can you, if not a village, contain them at all?”

“Hiashi.” Tsunade ordered.

Her father tucked his hands in his sleeves and bowed. “No disrespect, Hokage-sama.”

Godaime sighed. “I understand your concern but this isn’t your decision.” She turned to her and her father didn’t follow the Hokage’s eyes, brown and intent as they were. “When Hinata wore that headband she promised loyalty to the village, not her clan. I believe you did as well,” she added smartly.

Her father remained bowed and silent.

“However. After further examination towards the danger of this mission, I’m giving her the luxury of choice. Hinata. Would you take this mission?” she asked.

It was then that her father rose but didn’t turn to look at her, whether to give her the choice without interference she didn’t know, except the two of her family were stiff in back and ignoring her to her face. She felt farther away than she ever felt before. Hinata tried to find something else, some other feeling, maybe hope in succeeding this mission, maybe even finding Naruto again. But she felt nothing. She looked like Hanabi.

Hinata remembered the last time she checked Naruto’s chakra, it was blue and beating but stable. It made her feel calm. One day it was like this until it wasn’t, until Naruto kept his hand flat to the ground and he looked like he was yelling at himself, though she wasn’t close enough to hear. He beat his stomach repeatedly with his other fist and Hinata wanted to help him then, she knew enough about chakra flow that she could reverse gentle fist any blockages, that’s what she thought. She activated her Byakugan. Naruto screamed and the red flared like _hellsfire_ , burning her vision and she gasped before she fainted.

Hinata didn’t want to relive the memory again. She didn’t want to find just what they say Naruto had become.

“May I speak with my daughter… privately?” Hiashi asked.

The Hokage took the time to think about it. Hinata didn’t look up though she could tell when the woman was staring, coolly sizing her up and making her assessments. Tsunade clapped twice. A blur of shadows and then the sound of chair legs dragging along the floor, the Godaime donning her hat and cape. Jiraiya-san yawned loudly and stretched. He slipped right behind her and the Hokage bantered with him, flicked him with her finger and he dodged, laughing his way out the door. With a quick bow to father, her sister followed them.

It was quiet.

“I don’t agree with this.”

Hinata hid under the stare of her father with her hands at her sides.

“Yes, father.”

Hiashi beckoned her towards him and Hinata shuffled her feet, keeping her eyes to the ground.

“I give you permission to speak.”

Her hair fell into her eyes.

His white stare said nothing. Cold and empty and unblinking. “As a Hyuuga you must think of the clan. The Byakugan is our prized doujutsu and one of the last few defenses left of Konoha. You are Main Branch. You are unsealed. What shall you do if you get captured?” He asked, keeping his eyes on her.

“I don’t know, father.”

“If you willingly undergo branding, I can release you with confidence.”

Her face went ashen.

Hiashi continued. “As exemplary trackers we are tasked in capturing criminals and interpreting vital hidden information on our enemies, our eyes ideal to search the body for any medical inflammation – when did you notice this boy?”

She flushed despite herself.

Her father hummed curiously and she scrunched her eyes, keeping her head bowed as the red crept up her neck and cheeks and ears.

“You’re very quiet today.”

“I-I’m sorry, father.”

“You liked this boy? Neji told me much about him.”

“I’m sorry, father.” She bowed sharply and the red didn’t stop, her eyes were frozen wide and her heart couldn’t stop hammering in her chest.

Hiashi never acted immediately. Never showed his intentions in his face. Naruto was dead but just him _knowing_ , finding out anyway made Hinata shake until she clasped her hands, terrified. Unsure of what he would say next.

She didn’t know just what left of Naruto he could take away from her.

She remembered he never minded before what either of them did with their free time, Hinata and Hanabi, as long as it was in line with the clan and appropriate to the two of them as his heirs. As his daughters. Hinata was going to keep her love secret, until maybe she was stronger enough… to make her dad proud, to be loud enough to confess.

She would’ve never told him (either of them) something like this.

“I’m-”

“Go search for him.”

She blinked.

Hiashi looked at her with interest. “You have my permission. Go search for him.”

Hinata lifted her head slowly, even more unsure than before.

“You won’t find Uzumaki Naruto, Hinata, he won’t be what you’re used to. But I think maybe you’ll find what you need in what you were always looking for. Come to terms with your feelings,” he said in all complete seriousness.

_W-what?_

“I can tell that this boy’s death has affected you greatly.” Hinata nodded to herself and her dad sighed. “I am only sorry I hadn’t noticed my eldest daughter sooner.”

She needed to ask. “W-why?”

He hummed deeply. “I admit I still disagree, not including the ultimate power of the ninetails: the strongest of the tailed beasts in existence. Do you know the story? The Kyuubi attacked the village 12 years ago, devastating everything until it was finally sealed into your friend.”

Her eyes widened.

“Yes, Uzumaki Naruto was the carrier of the demon. At least he was, until just recently. Finding it, locating it, recapturing it… you may be young for the task but it is in _your_ blood.”

He spoke with clear intonation, standing straight before her with full confidence.

“Do as Jiraiya-sama says and never close your eyes, always look one step ahead. Strike with confidence,” he ordered and Hinata jumbled at the sudden change of heart, she nodded quickly.

When enough time passed for him to size her well she knew not to say anything to interrupt because the Hyuuga always spoke with their eyes. Hiashi watched her fidget, still feeling belatedly ashamed at his discovery, confused over just what he was telling her to do.

What else was there to find? Everyone told her Naruto was gone.

White eyes went hard and she flinched feeling small in her skin; Hinata’s heart raced. Her father’s Byakugan was activated before her sight for the second time in her life but his voice… his voice was old and dark. “Remember this distinction well, Hinata. Should anyone make the mistake. The Hyuuga are the hunters and we are nothing like the Uchihas… We don’t summon demons.”


	4. Chapter 4

She couldn’t find him. _Again_.

In times like these, Hinata would check the usual places – the brothel house, the bars – places so sleazy it made her guilty just to look, and she would blush and hide her eyes in second-hand shame. The women (and sometimes men) would smile at her knowingly, make her redden further when they would wave, sometimes even beckon her to come over, hoot and call her names. The red light districts of every town they went to were the same, that she thought that over time she could get used to it, but she hasn’t. Hinata knew she grew up sheltered and knew there was a lot of things she _didn’t_ know: there was always something new to find and accidentally see too much with her eyes. A woman wearing nothing but a see-through mesh shirt broke out of the hotel doors, plastic kunai holsters definitely _not_ holding kunai. Hinata regretted her clan’s treasured sight. She couldn’t deactivate her Byakugan fast enough. Everywhere had _things_ , and she felt betrayed by the deceptively peaceful part of the city, including this ‘hotel’… hiding under the innocence of what she had seen should only be a backyard rock garden and complementary koi pond.

When Jiraiya-sama stumbled out with his robe dressed haphazardly, his orange obi tied loosely until the ends of it dragged on the floor, he hiccupped, burped, smiled and giggled creepy things under his breath before clacking his geta after the woman. Hinata was forced to envision his super hairy legs as she chased (he argued it was part of her training) foresee where he was headed (she had to do it, she had to transform into the image of that woman even though these clothes weren’t even _ninja protective_ , oh god) and then-

“Aha!”

Not this again.

Instead of being a normal person, she blushed because he always had to make a scene. Jiraiya-sama whipped his long, white hair until he could generate a small wind for his hundredth dynamic entrance. He clacked into his favorite stance, the “ _Toad Sannin Introduction # 6”_ , and she thought she could hear firecrackers popping in the background.

Hinata didn’t want to see them anymore. _His legs are so hairy…_

“The number one travel ninja, with the best tastes all around, full-time best-selling erotica novelist-”

She wasn’t gonna let him finish that sentence. “Jiraiya-sama-”

“Oho, so you do know of me and my worldly greatness.”

“Please-”

He raised a hand in placation. “No, no, no. No need to ask. I always give pretty girls free autographs.”

She blinked. “Oi… wait…”

When he pulled out a pen from _godknowswhere_ , she backed a step and he appeared to write an autograph on her arm. Instead, he threw the pen down suddenly. The thing exploded into a smokescreen. Hinata coughed, she got some dust in her eyes and the smell of sulfur burned through her nose. Jiraiya laughed in his escape, chuckling at her expense.

“Ah, too bad, Hinata, looks like I have some urgent business to attend to... I’m afraid I have to find my writing inspiration before this plot _bunny_ escapes me. I keep telling you if you actually looked at these women maybe you would improve your transformation accuracy. Good luck!” He called out.

She turned red. “Jiraiya-sama!”

She can’t believe she lost him again.

…

She looked for him all night and into the morning, only to find him mid-afternoon outside of the village they were visiting. She didn’t know how a drunk, pervert ninja like him made it here, far out into the countryside, where anybody could attack him in his sleep. The great sannin groggily shifted from where he lay, still wearing his orange under-kimono. His beer gut was exposed and his hair was tangled with dry twigs and leaves; Hinata held her ground, but couldn’t help but turn her head away at the stench of booze and his sweat.

“Please. If you would listen to me I could tell you… I- I think I found something.”

The tree shading his heavy form shook lightly in the wind, and Jiraiya groaned.

“Please, Jiraiya-sama, please wake up.”

He yawned and turned in his sleep. “Hm, Hinata?”

“I think I found something.”

“-what now?”

“A chakra surge. Only six kilometers from our position.” Hinata clasped her hands before her chest because she could feel her heart pounding at the reality of their situation. She did feel something. She felt it close. “Jiraiya-sama… I don’t know what it is. It’s powerful.”

The sannin suddenly blinked himself awake, his eyes focused on her. “You sure?”

“Yes, sir.”

The sannin came to a stand. He bent and stretched and cracked his neck and back. He adjusted his clothes before shaking out the twigs in his hair. “Ah, I slept too much anyway, thanks, Hinata.”

Hinata watched him as he prepped, slowly, taking his time to clasp his arm guards together, fasten the velcro of his gloves. He wasn’t that old of a ninja, but there was always something heavy weighing on his shoulders, especially at times like these when she was sure she found something, when they were close to finishing their mission. He would smile and thank her politely, and commend her her Byakugan sight, but for some reason she felt guilty.

She thought… that maybe he was avoiding her on purpose. Jiraiya hummed pleasantly as he prepped and Hinata thought that maybe the drinking was too forced, too indulgent for his tastes, though she didn’t know him well enough before to compare. She could only guess, from what she saw. Hinata tried not to sound too hopeful, she tried to be quiet and patient, in case the great sannin was still in mourning.

It’s been three years of traveling with the great sannin and he was always pleasant with her, courteous and patient about her stuttering and so, so _empty_. He was her sensei for three years and yet somehow managed to keep distant, no matter what she said or did – or more like didn’t say at all. He smiled, but for some reason she didn’t want to see him smile anymore.

Hinata didn’t know how to express that in a way that wasn’t off.

She quietly nodded, and Jiraiya ordered her.

“Lead the way.”

…

They were close.

She could sense the chakra pulsing against her in waves the closer they leaped towards its source. Looking at it, it was everywhere, spewing dark tendrils through the trees that she was sure Jiraiya could feel too. Any human being, ninja or no, could recognize the ominous energy from the direction they were headed, and a smart one would run in the opposite way. It was a dark energy that only got darker, angrier, pulsing uncontrollably as if it knew they were coming.

Was it the Kyuubi?

She looked at Jiraiya but he wasn’t looking at her, his eyes were hard and focused forward.

…

All the animals were gone.

She sought for any other living being in the vicinity, any small source of chakra other than the powerful heat before them. Either the small forest creatures burrowed themselves deep, flew, escaped, or… she didn’t want to think it. The heat of power blasted at her skin, whipping her hair and reddening at her cheeks.

“Hinata. Where is it?”

Hinata shook her head.

“What? What’s wrong?” Jiraiya stopped.

“I-I’m sorry, I-I don’t know anymore, it’s too much-”

“Can you tell me a general direction?”

She shook again.

“Hm,” he said as he clapped her on her shoulder. She knew he could feel her shivering. Jiraiya didn’t say anything. “Strange that its chakra is this turbulent, the Kyuubi would not make itself a target like this. What do you see? Is there something else?”

Hinata quaked at the sheer chakra force, every instinct in her doujutsu telling her to look away, to run. Her eyes widened, in fear and under orders, until she fought through the overwhelming rush and spotted them a lake.

Jiraiya quickly nodded.

“Let’s go.”

…

_Oh god_ , she thought. They were wrong. She was so wrong.

When the black coats turned, patterned red clouds flapping in the chakra’s gust, Hinata gasped. Jiraiya caught her, covered her eyes with a slap of his palm and swiftly shushinned them to safety. The tree branch creaked under her sandals.

The dust settled and the bandaged sword had barely missed.

“Ah. You again.” One of them said from below.

“Hinata.” Jiraiya ignored him and bent down to speak to her quietly. “Whatever you do, don’t look at Itachi, even with your Byakugan. He’s looking straight at you because he knows your sight is activated. Quickly, shut it off.”

Hinata froze suddenly.

“…I can’t,” she whispered. Her eyes were wide open under his palm and she shook.

“Hinata? Hinata?”

Sweat beaded on her forehead as the veins at her temples cinched, gripping her brain into a major headache. She couldn’t deactivate her Byakugan. She couldn’t blink. Reflexive water pooled into the corners of her eyes as her chakra slowly left her, draining from the forced excessive use of her doujutsu.

Her Byakugan has never been this exhausted before, even during her training, whether under Jiraiya-sama’s tutelage or her father’s. As an extension of her mind and body it only took a steady stream of her chakra, flowing easily to her eyes and out – nothing was wasted. But this fight she came into already at a disadvantage, having used her eyes for the past hour, not to mention the whole night spent searching for her sensei in the first place. Then again, she thought, it was her Byakugan activated against a _Sharingan_. She was already losing.

“I’m too late,” she spoke.

“No, I’m afraid you two arrived exactly.” Hinata didn’t turn to look at the man who said the words, standing calmly farther out onto the lake. Because she didn’t need to. She could see him speak, right there in her mind.

He looked like Sasuke, only taller, only older, and with a quiet, cool look focused on her.

“Hinata, don’t. Don’t pay attention to his words, don’t try to find him.”

“Interesting.”

“Jiraiya-sama-”

“Don’t.”

“She’s already been caught under my genjutsu,” Itachi drawled, slowly and mocking. “Jiraiya-sensei.”

“There was no direct eye-contact.” Her teacher spoke clearly so that the black coats could hear. The one below them, the blue one, smirked. “I’m sure of it.”

“I’m curious too.”

“You knew we were coming?”

“No,” Itachi replied honestly, and his voice was deep through the gusts of chakra, unaffected by the sound of lashing waves in the lake. “But I am surprised you found us here. The Byakugan, I presume?”

The hand left her eyes, realizing how pointless it was, that it was too late to save her. “Pure dumb luck,” Jiraiya spat at them.

Itachi didn’t respond.

“We were training when we got the unfortunate luck of stumbling into you… We’re not here to fight,” he added slowly.

Itachi ignored Jiraiya’s words and watched her in silence. Hinata got the feeling he knew she was aware of his eyes, of who he was and of his soft curiosity. He wasn’t another Sasuke. He was different. The chakra of the tailed beast between them whirled unaddressed, and he stood on the lake unmoving while she observed him in turn.

The man had her already under his power, and through Jiraiya’s hand, eye contact had been made. Why wasn’t he doing anything? Hinata couldn’t sense any signs of genjutsu. Only the chakra beast gave off significant killing intent, it struggled for control and she could see the turtle head and limbs thrash and roar. The blue man under them stepped back, his sword clearly directing his motion to the source of chakra, while Itachi calmly approached.

Jiraiya’s voice got louder.

“We’re leaving.”

The elder Uchiha wasn’t replying.

“Hinata,” Jiraiya spoke to her, viewing their opponents warily. “Can you move?”

“I’m sorry-”

“Damn.”

“Jiraiya-sensei-”

“Okay. Okay. I’m going to sling you over my shoulder and I’m going to summon Gamaken at the same time. Try to deactivate your eyes. Close them if you can.”

“What about the tailed beast?” she stuttered shamefully.

“Don’t worry about it. The three tails was not our priority.”

“I-”

“I know you didn’t mean to find it. We didn’t train to fine tune your eyes. Don’t worry about it,” he said, but she did worry.

Her sense of balance shifted suddenly, and she found herself light in the air. She saw for a brief moment the detailed growing cracks in the branch she had stood on, before her vision was consumed by smoke.

The blue man whistled.

Jiraiya ignored him while he made his quick hand signs, and Gamaken-san unhinged his mouth. She felt a tongue muscle constrict around her, saliva soaking through her overcoat before her weight changed direction rapidly. Hinata gasped.

“You use her Byakugan to search for jinchuuriki,” Itachi said. He sounded so assured and calm. And he was right.

Jiraiya ordered. “Gamaken, go!”

Wind was forced down on her as the Great Toad leaped their escape in the air. Her breathing was short and her eyes watered, but Hinata couldn’t help but to focus on the small figures far below. Itachi was saying something to her sensei, she was too far up to read his lips but she could see how Jiraiya braced himself, settling into a horse stance. His hands came together in a final clap, right at the moment Itachi disappeared into a flock of crows.

The ride was too turbulent and the exhaustion in her eyes had finally caught up to her. Her vision swirled into darkness.

…


End file.
